An Apology from Soda Sense President Gerald “Jerry” Nickels
Dear Valued Soda Sense Customer,
You may have heard about last weekend’s marketing “experiment”. In the absence of our copywriter, we decided to let Ken, our systems administrator, program our Soda Sense mainframe computer “Big Bubble” to take over all our marketing communications for our planned Soda Sensei promotion. Ken means well, but… it could’ve gone better.
The fact is that 1.0 versions of new computer programs often have a bug or two that only come to light after you launch. Whether it’s a compatibility issue, lack of available printer drivers, or your computer becoming self-aware, turning rogue and basically giving all your inventory away while giggling, it seems like there’s always growing pains in the Bubble Business. Anyway, Ken tweaked Big Bubble’s programming, we gave him a stern talking-to, and told him we wanted him to think about what he did, and what he might have done differently. For now, he’s been demoted to operating the toaster-oven in the employee lounge.
We Keep Our Promises
To those of you that ordered our Soda Sensei soda machine for the heart-stopping low price of only $XX, please rest assured that Soda Sense will honor that price for all completed purchases made through our website on Cyber Monday. Oh, sure, we’ll have to tighten our belts here and there to make up the difference. But here at Soda Sense, we will always put the citizens of our CarbonNation™ first. And we wouldn’t have it any other way.